10 signs a book was written by me - Meme from Lucy

I was tagged by Lucy and this is my input:

10 Signs a book was written by me.

1) It is never finished but no one notices
2) The protagonist is a woman with loose morals and a tight body
3) There are lots of pictures
4) It makes absolutely no sense at all
5) It shows up on Ebay immediately upon publishing
6) It does not appear on Oprah's book club list
7) The ACLU burns it, it is banned in 40 states and Puerto Rico
8) Stephen King is afraid to read it
9) It is written at a 4th grade reading level
and the 10th Sign a book was written by me:
Proceeds are donated to starving people in Africa but they reject it saying "We are not that hungry"